May 2008
17 posts
i can’t keep pretending that ½ a relationship with...
The problem with this email is that almost none of it is true. Not only was I through with him because I was angry about his cheating and disenchanted with him as a lover, but the thought of being his girlfriend actually made my stomach hurt. My friends were begging me to leave him because they thought his emotional abuse would turn physical, and I already had started an affair with someone else....
i feel a lot of possibility when i'm around you
it took him two days to write back. i wanted to die during those hours, sure that i’d scared him off and blown it. it did eventually end in a firey mess (of course), but this wasn’t the email that set it off. or maybe it was. maybe it was the beginning of the end. san diego, california —- hi, XXXX i’m at rebecca’s again, supposed to be working, but it’s come...
i don't know what you want, but it's not me
i didn’t want to break up over email, but it was like a force that came over me, and i had to do it right then. it felt so final at the time, but really it’s so ambiguous. i called him later and i said i was drunk when i sent it, and having a bad day. he didn’t question it. we are still together. i am still miserable. seattle, washington —- XXXX i dont think we should see...
sweet face
i know that being overly affectionate can be stifling in a relationship, but i want to be with him all the time. i set a goal that i wouldn’t call him today. and then i had a beer. and texting isn’t calling, right? no city, no state —- when am i going to see your sweet face again
i have a bad habit of falling madly in love
tallahassee, florida —- Dear You, I purposely took the long way home tonight, just to avoid driving by your house, even though it would have saved me a good three miles. I accidentally drove by it earlier tonight, but I pretended I had never been to the house and didn’t know who lived there. I didn’t even look at it. I drove around blasting Dr. Dre, hoping intensely that I was...
eep, you're adorable!
this was to a guy i had seen around over the course of a year at various shows and around campus. after discovering we had a mutual friend, i took the opportunity to try and get to know him. we had a lot of awkward conversations, mostly over email (my doing), but eventually my social anxiety kept us from ever successfully going on a date. i stood him up at least four times, but the little trooper...
i rescind this statement
this is one of my great shameful emails, mostly because it is an emotional outpouring to someone that i didn’t know, and wouldn’t know. XXXX is a writer that a friend and i both became kind of enamored with when we saw him give a reading. portland being the town that it is, i later saw him around and we got coffee. this writer had a mfa in creative writing and name-dropped russian...
it only gets worse every time i see you
sent to an old boss from when i was an intern. he’s 12 years older and was certainly just taking advantage of a younger more naive me. we “dated” for 2 years. god. what a mess. los angeles, california —- I wanted to thank you again for last night, I had a really good time. And also just give you an update on the trials and tribulations of my quarter-life-crisis-filled girl...
this company wouldn't survive without us
a week after i sent this email to a coworker, we found out that all communications, personal or otherwise, were being monitored by our bosses. we were both let go. los angeles, california —- Dear XXXX, I’m starting to think our bosses are the most incapable people I’ve ever seen. If they aren’t gorging in the kitchen, they are drinking in the bar. Don’t worry though,...
thought i'd take a much needed break and google...
a tragic moment in my career as an almost groupie. luckily i came to my senses about randomly crushing on guys i dont know just because they’ve been in rolling stone and stopped the email exchange before i lost too much self respect. washington, dc —- So I’ve been attempting to edit a paper all day and thought I’d take a much needed break and google you since, although you...
has our relationship progressed to xs and os
having odd flirtations over email at work with famous, married writers whose work you’re editing … great idea, right? no city, no state —- him: why is YYYY listed as the author before me on my last column? xox XXXX me: not sure. i didn’t post. we can change. i’m sure it was just a mistake. has our relationship progressed to xs and os? him: you don’t think? me:...
the end. now leave.
los angeles, california —- i chose to end this relationship in january. i have trust issues, i can’t stop imagining you with another girl, etc. aside from many other reasons that we just don’t get along when we’re not in the same place - i’m jealous of your lifestyle, job, social life, etc. I have my own infidelity/self esteem problems. I enjoy the attention of other...
we do what we have to do
los angeles, california —- i fucked up tonight. again. i know. i wish i could explain my jealousy. my self doubt. my insecurity. I take advantage of the idea that you understand and can sympathize with me, but i fear i’m reaching the end of your rope on that compassion. beside my self-assurance that you spend your days thinking of ways to cheat on me, i waste time and energy thinking...
a versatile and talented writer
i applied for a copywriting job that involved writing commercials and radio spots. the ad said to be creative and stand out, and at 3a, i chose to do so in the most mediocre way possible. i imagine that this is posted in hr at XXXX communications as the worst cover letter ever received. in the morning, when i realized what i’d done, i decided that i would ignore any request for an interview;...
i don't know if we're really friends
a boy and i stopped seeing each other due to mostly mutual non-attraction. i wanted to be friends, badly i’d say, by the earnestness of this email. shudder, shudder. part of me wants to write him an email saying, uh, remember me, sorry i was sort of a nut, but …. no. san diego, california —- mornin xxxx, kajsdkfljskdljjsladkjflaskjdfkl blahhhhhhhhhhhh. i was going to craft and...
an email was obvi coming
i made out with an almost-friend. it was awkward. but not one to give up, i wrote this email, hoping to accomplish … what? this was during the days when i thought saying i was crazy was a free pass for doing crazy things, like sending bad emo emails. false. san diego, california —- word. so an email was obvi coming. i was going to try to play it cool and not write you one for some time...
might be contingent on that small detail
retrospectively, two weeks of ambiguous friend-dates might have been a little early for this onslaught of affection … san diego, california —- xxxx, hi. im wearing your tshirt and your deodorant. i smell like you. it’s nice. are you planning to be back in town for new years? i want to buy my tkt today and return date might be contingent on that small detail. telll meeee. xxxx