MODERNSHAME

MODERNSHAME was created because misery loves company. it is a place for emails better left unsent, texts that should have stayed in the draft box, and other pieces of ourselves that we put out there too quickly because we can.

why share regretful correspondence? because we have all been there, and a collective cringe is so much better than a solitary one, alone behind your computer screen thinking unsend! take back! undo!

you can't take it back, but you can put it here.

SUBMISSIONS will be posted anonymously. this is a site for shedding dirt, not getting it. no names will ever be posted.

we want authentic, but not damning. we will XXXX-out any identifying details contained in your emails if you don't black them out yourself.

include a brief explanation of the email, your city and state, and consider yourself absolved.

modernshame@gmail.com
Mon May 5

a versatile and talented writer

i applied for a copywriting job that involved writing commercials and radio spots. the ad said to be creative and stand out, and at 3a, i chose to do so in the most mediocre way possible. i imagine that this is posted in hr at XXXX communications as the worst cover letter ever received. in the morning, when i realized what i’d done, i decided that i would ignore any request for an interview; obviously it would just be to mock me. there wasn’t one.
portland, oregon

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INT: XXXX’S BEDROOM
XXXX sits cross-legged on her bed, typing on a laptop.

XXXX (v.o.)
I’m XXXX, and I’m a versatile and talented writer with experience in factual copy, journalism, and creative writing.

INT: XXXX OFFICE
XXXX is sitting in a cubicle, typing away on the same laptop.

XXXX (v.o)
In my current position with XXXX Websites, I infuse all of the company’s marketing materials with XXXX’s distinct voice.

EXT: AMUSMENT PARK
XXXX is sitting on a bench, typing on her laptop, surrounded by smiling happy FAMILIES.

XXXX (v.o.)
When working on our client websites, I adjust my writing style for each client’s need and intended audience. I will create website copy for a vacation house near Disney World that will evoke the magical memories to be made on a family vacation …

INT: SKI LODGE
XXXX is typing on her laptop next to a crackling fire, she is surrounded by SKIERS and REVELERS. Large windows reveal snow-covered slopes. She is oblivious to the skiers, and they are oblivious to her.

XXXX (v.o)
Or craft more sophisticated copy to describe a luxurious Aspen condo that caters to affluent sports enthusiasts …

INT: CONFERENCE ROOM
A BUSINESS WOMAN is giving a presentation to a table full of PEOPLE. XXXX sits at the table near the woman, typing on her laptop.

XXXX (v.o.)
As a research assistant at XXXX, a consumer branding and research company, I distilled our research findings and conclusions into reports that were utilized by client company executives and ad agencies …


INT: XXXX’S APARTMENT
XXXX is sitting at a desk, typing on her computer and referencing a stack of papers.

XXXX (v.o.)
And as a freelance writer, I have written articles and essays for a variety of audiences …

INT: CITY COUNCIL MEETING
XXXX is sitting in the audience at the meeting on her laptop, surrounded by smart-looking COMMUNITY ACTIVISTS

XXXX (v.o.)
Educated liberal thinkers for XXXX …

INT: WHOLE FOODS
XXXX is sitting in the café area of this posh grocery store surrounded by affluent Santa Monica SOCIALITES and BUSINESS TYPES

XXXX (v.o.)
Affluent environmentalists for XXXX Magazine …

INT: UNIVERSITY LIBRARY
XXXX is sharing a table with bunches of HIP COLLEGE STUDENTS. They are all typing on laptops

XXXX (v.o.)
And irreverent college students for the XXXX Weekly.

INT: XXXX’S ROOM
XXXX is sitting cross-legged on her bed, typing on her laptop. She looks up.

XXXX (to camera)
With my variety of writing experiences and my ability to adapt to new situations and challenges, I will make a valuable addition to the XXXX Communications team.


FADE TO BLACK

THE END